I was standing on a busy street corner in Vancouver, BC the other day.

And as I watched the traffic go by, I remembered a flash of insight I had a while ago about seeing the child in the people around me.

So I tried it again.

I imagined all the drivers as they might have been when they were young children—innocent, full of life, love, and joy.

I imagined how they might have expressed themselves—their hopes and dreams, their joy, their love for people—freely and with abandon. Without fear, without defensiveness.

I imagined them before they “learned” the world is a cruel place, that people were out to get you, and that they’ll let you down. Before they put up barriers and walls to protect themselves from life’s pain.

I imagined them when they still lived in the moment—not dragging the past with them, or worrying about the future.

I imagined them when they expressed their pain or sadness immediately, openly and honestly. And then forgot it just as quickly.

For many years, I was really angry and judgmental. My automatic reaction to someone cutting me off in traffic, or driving waaaay too slow or taking waaaay too long to turn left (when I’m stuck behind them), was anger. I’d get really pissed off.

I would curse them for being useless, or careless, or even antagonistic (’cause of COURSE they were doing it to ME on purpose)!

But what was really underneath this reaction and behind these thoughts and feelings was the fundamental fear that I was not loved, that I was not valuable, that I did not belong.

And so everything that happened—even people’s behaviour in traffic—was viewed from a place of fear and defensiveness and struggling not to be dominated or taken advantage of.

And I remembered what a breakthrough it was—how my experience totally changed—when I saw the child in the people around me.”

I remembered how all of a sudden, I was not the weak one needing to defend myself against the strong.

In fact—in the person who was angry and striking out—I saw the child who was fearful, and longing for love. In the person who was sullen and withdrawn, I saw the child who was sad and needed comfort.

And my anger turned to compassion.

I saw that their behaviour did not mean that something was wrong with me. I saw that their behaviour, in fact, didn’t have anything to do with me at all.

As I started to see people as the children they once were, I felt empathy and a connection to them.”

My heart started opening to them and my own barriers and fear-based ways of thinking started to fade away and have less power over me.

And as I stood there on that street corner in Vancouver, I imagined what the world would be like if we all saw the child in each other.

If we recognized the fear behind another’s anger and violence, and knew that it didn’t mean we did something wrong, and that we didn’t have to fight about it.

If we recognized the sadness behind the coldness and disconnection in another, and knew that it didn’t mean that we were unloveable.

Imagine how you feel when you look at a wailing child in the grocery store who’s terrified because they lost their mother. Do you feel anger towards them because they’re upset? Or do you feel compassion for them because you can see their fear.

I invite you to try seeing their inner child the next time you encounter someone who’s upset—and see if it shifts your experience.

I bet it will!

And it’s not even a metaphor—I really AM going to camp for the summer!

‘Course, I’m going as a scuba instructor, not a camper…but still—camp is camp, and it’ll be an adventure for sure!

I’ve been thinking about what this adventure might be like—and how going to camp as an adult is different than going as a youngster. And it reminds me of a conversation I had recently with my friend Gary.

We were talking about following our dreams, and he asked me what I thought about the metaphor of “running towards our dream”.

I thought for a moment, and something just didn’t feel right. It took me about a minute before I realized what it was.

When I pictured myself—as an adult—running towards my dream, I noticed some concerns in the background. Concerns about whether I was running fast enough to catch it; and what would happen when I caught it; or what if I didn’t catch it.

And even about why I was running in the first place—was something coming up behind me that I needed to escape? Or was my dream running away from me? Did I have to be running?

I felt a kind of nagging heaviness…

Then I pictured myself running towards my dream—as a little boy. And EVERYthing changed.”

As a boy, I ran because it felt good to run! Because I was excited about something. Because it was the natural thing to do. There were no concerns, just joy.

A few years ago when I was doing triathlons, I had a breakthrough in running by learning “chi running” (which is essentially re-learning to run as a child runs).

As adults, most of us run hopelessly inefficiently. We use our big leg muscles to push us forward each step—and then, ironically, we immediately apply the “brake” by landing on our heel. It’s not only extremely inefficient, it’s also why most of us continue to hurt ourselves.

But if you watch a child run, it’s totally different. They simply lean in the direction they want to go, and then—so they don’t fall flat on their face—they simply place a foot in front of their body. One at a time, over and over. It’s like they’re falling forward, just managing to stay upright.

And it’s almost effortless—because gravity does most of the work.”

The only leg muscles they have to use are the ones necessary to pick up the leg and move it forward. There’s no need to lift and push the entire weight of their body forward, they let gravity do that. And, of course, there’s the added bonus of not “braking” every step of the way—which creates FAR less impact (read, injury) on the body.

I think the same thing applies to going to camp. As an adult, I’m concerned about whether I know everything I need to know, whether I’ll be able to handle the unexpected and challenging situations that are certain to come up, whether I’ll do a good job. Kinda stressful.

But the child in me doesn’t worry about any of those things. The boy in me is excited about sharing his love of scuba diving with other boys who are just as excited about learning it. The boy in me is excited about making new friends and sharing the joy of adventure with them.

The boy in me is simply leaning in the direction of his adventure, making sure to keep his feet in motion, and simply letting the Universe do the work of taking him forward.”

As Dhyan Vimal says, “If you want to live in ecstasy, in joy, you must go on an adventure.”

My adventure this summer will be teaching scuba diving at camp. (Actually, it’s already begun—I just finished taking my “dry suit specialty” yesterday, ’cause the water will be COOOOOLD and I’ll need to wear a dry suit if I’m going to “survive” this adventure!)

What adventure are you embarking on this summer? What thrill of adventure is enticing the child in you? Inquiring minds want to know.

What’s so awesome about this approach is that this immediately brings good feelings like joy, freedom, peace, etc…

And this totally fits the “think. be. do. have.” paradigm. By choosing to create a mental picture of whatever it is that she is wanting (the “think”), she gets to have the experience that she wants (the “be”)—right now!

We all know about the “power of now”—but this is the “JOY of now”!”

Instead of grasping at some hopeful, future reality (which often just makes us feel bad by accentuating the pain of the current reality we DON’T want), we can play this game where we—in the moment—actually experience the reality that we DO want. Right now.

For me, this is a breakthrough in visualization—and the impact on me and my life is significant. Automatically my shoulders relax. I breathe easier. My heart slows. My mind clears. My energy lifts.

And I’m free, as Danielle says, to “reverse engineer” my dream.

I can work backwards from the “done deal” and figure out what I need to do make it happen. And then—inspired and empowered—I can take action to produce the very results I’m imagining.

But again, the best part about doing visualization this way is that I don’t have to wait until I get the “money, keys, relationship, etc.” to experience the freedom, joy, peace, excitement I want—I get to have that experience now!

And for me, this is really the point. (Because “JOY is the point!”)

Because, really, the “things” we want are just the “stuff” of time and space. Like the clay the potter works with. The clay is not the point—it’s just the stuff through which she can express and experience the feelings and ideas that lie within her. Her ideas and feelings are the point.

In the same way, the “happy circumstances” that we want to create for ourselves don’t matter in and of themselves—it’s the experience we have OF these circumstances that matter (whether they exist in our mind or in time and space).

The good news, then, is not that visualization helps us manifest that which we want to create—the good news is that visualization (done this way) gives us the gifts of joy and freedom and power and inspiration that we truly want. Right here, right now.”

So give it a try. Try on the idea that whatever it is you are wanting to create in your life is actually a “done deal”. Imagine that it already IS.

And believe me, you will feel freedom and joy arise in your heart. (And if you don’t, it may be that this particular dream isn’t really your heart’s desire—but that’s another conversation.)

I’d love it if you were to share with us your “done deal”. I invite you to tell us what you see, in the present tense—right here and now.

For me, I’m living with the love of my life in our beautiful home at the edge of a tropical sea where we can hear the waves and feel the caress of the warm breeze while holding hands as we sit together on our front porch.

It’s a done deal.

And my heart is filled with joy and love and gratitude.

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.”

Who was it that said that? I wasn’t sure, so I did a quick search. It was the title of Elizabeth Barrett Browning’s Sonnet 43.

So what am I talking about? I’m talking about the little island of Utila, off the coast of Honduras (and Belize)—my home for 13 of the last 19 months. And the birthplace of Breakthrough Adventures.

As I leave the island again, I thought I’d list a few things I loved and appreciated about my experience here—starting with my home at Sandstone Apartments:

1. The private little sandy spot at the water’s edge where I meditate each morning.
2. The warm easterly wind blowing into my open arms, and the rising sun warming my face.
3. The sound of the waves rolling in and breaking on the reef.
4. The hummingbirds flitting around, and the sound of gekkos calling to each other.
5. Don Victor keeping our building immaculate.
6. Watching scuba divers giant stride off the boat a 100 metres offshore from my home.
7. Sondra doing such an amazing job ensuring that all her tenants’ needs were met.
8. The gazebo where I sit and write this, and where we’d have our potluck gatherings.
9. My neighbour Carolyn’s hearty laughter as she experiences the joy of retiring to a Caribbean island at the age of 65.
10. The mainland mountains in the distance reminding me of home.

And then there’s the town:

1. The lovely walk into town everyday that kept me at a nice slow pace of life and let me appreciate my surroundings.
2. Hubert, and the buffet meals, big airy space, and great internet at his cafe, Mermaids—my office away from my home office.
3. The friendly locals smiling and nodding as they ride by on their motorcycles, ATV’s, scooters, golf carts and bicycles.
4. Ana, the super-friendly and capable dentist.
5. The fact that it was OK to walk around town half-naked.
6. The laughter and silliness of the cute servers at Munchies. And the veggie fajitas.
7. Hans’ (the Mares store owner) for his patience when I made a couple of mistakes buying new scuba gear (the wetsuit and mask were too large, so he let me change them—even after I used them once).
8. Havier, the friendly owner of my favourite grocery store—who was always willing to cut a frozen chicken in half for me, no matter how busy he was (my soup pot wasn’t big enough for a whole one).
9. Swimming to the lighthouse from UDC’s dock.
10. Honduran Immigration for making it so easy for me to stay here.

And last but not least, UDC—the best dive operation on the island (and voted best instructor development centre by PADI 2 years in a row):

1. Andy, the brilliant and supportive Course Director who has “set the bar” so high for the quality of instruction—and makes sure it’s stays there (and makes sure every student gets the support he needs to pass with flying colours).
2. Suzy, (also a Course Director) who made me feel so welcome when I first contacted UDC by email about doing my dive training (and who also works extremely hard to make sure every student gets the instruction and training they need).
3. Jimmy, who makes sure the shop runs like a well-oiled machine and that all staff and customers are taken care of.
4. Simon, who’s been helpful in brainstorming ideas with me for Breakthrough Adventures.
5. Josiah, Declan, Sarah, Maddy, Maya, and Fernando—all exceptional instructors from whom I’ve learned so much.
6. Our amazing boat captains who have an uncanny ability (and the patience) to find whalesharks and dolphins for us.
7. The warm, crystal clear, and life-filled waters of some of my favourite dive sites—Labyrinth, Airport Caves, CJ’s Drop-off, Black Hills—and the fun of penetrating The Haliburton.
8. Sunny trips out to the beautiful Cayes.
9. The amazing and courageous students I’ve certified and the friends I’ve made from ALL over the world—Denmark, Sweden, Australia, New Zealand, England, Ireland, Belgium, France, Germany, US, Canada, Japan, Spain, Israel, Argentina, Brazil…damn, I know I’m forgetting some…
10. The incredible wealth of information, training and experience that I’ve received as a dive instructor.

Fare thee well, dear little island—I know we shall meet again soon.

I had a rough time this morning during my meditation. In fact, it took a while for me to even get to a place where I could…

I was in my usual spot at the water’s edge, the morning sun shining off the sea, the waves rolling in, the mountains in the distance looking as beautiful as ever…

But I wasn’t enjoying it. I wasn’t taking it in.

I was struggling with something, feeling sad and frustrated and disconnected. Unsettled. Like something was very wrong.

So I stopped even trying to calm my mind down to meditate. Instead, I took myself through the “discovery and re-creation” breakthrough process I use when I, or my clients, are stuck.

I started by asking myself—what’s the area of life that’s bothering me? Answer—my community.

I looked at what I was doing. I was writing and posting articles, pictures, and inspiring quotes and videos; I’d get a few comments, but most of my friends—even close friends—weren’t commenting or “liking” any of the posts; AND, a conversation with an affiliate had just stopped. No response. Nothing.

Like I said, I was feeling pretty down. And even angry. Like, WTF?! Why don’t my friends support me—don’t they know that building a new business is difficult and I could use their help?! And why isn’t that affiliate responding—did I say or do something wrong?!

I looked at what was underneath these feelings—my thoughts. What did I think or believe—about myself, about people, about life—that might be causing this sadness and anger?”

Answer—I must be doing something wrong, but I don’t know what. I’m doing everything I know to do, and I’m trying to do it in the right way.

I’m being friendly, trying to be inspiring, supportive, trying to give value to my community. I even started thinking about what friends I could ask what THEY thought people think of me. You know, try to see myself from other people’s perspective and see what I might be doing wrong.

As I dug deeper into what was driving these thoughts and feelings, I finally touched a nerve, and the tears started to flow.

I realized that everything I’m doing—from Breakthrough Adventures to coaching to writing articles to posting (what I think are) inspiring quotes—is to give value to the world. To create a value exchange.

I realized that this is what I want more than anything else in the world—to give and receive value, whether in relationship OR business.

And why do I want to do this? Because I want to be loved. I want to be valued.

Wow! That was it! That’s what this was all about. I was buying into my old story that I wasn’t loved. Or loveable. Or valuable.

And I was looking outside of myself for that love. For assurance that I AM valuable, that I AM wanted, that I AM loved.

And then I remembered—true Love starts with me. It starts with loving myself.”

I remembered that it’s up to me, it’s MY choice to give myself the Love that I so want. I had forgotten! I had been looking in the wrong place for that Love; I had been looking to my friends, colleagues, affiliates for the Love that only I can give myself.

And so once again, I chose Love—for myself.

And everything shifted in that moment. Suddenly the cold dark blanket of fear lifted, and I could again see the beauty of the sun, the sea, the surf, the birds, the mountains, the snails hugging the rocks, the little iguana that crawled by, the butterflies flitting around…

So, why am I sharing this with you? Because I know I’m not the only one who forgets this. I mean, I KNOW this stuff, but I STILL forget sometimes.

Now, am I giving you this reminder so you will love me and think I’m valuable? Nope, not this time. I KNOW I’m valuable.

No—I’m giving you this reminder because it brings me joy to think of the freedom and peace that you may experience because of it.

I know I sure do. Living in a new country and building a new (and uncommon) business provide plenty of opportunities for doubt.

And by doubt I mean uncertainty. Fear, even (which is the archaic definition of doubt).

Can I do this? Will enough people want what I have to offer? Will I be able to reach the people who DO want it? Is it too expensive? Is it not expensive enough? Did I pick the right island? What if I can’t find the right clients?”

These questions create waves of doubt—waves that wash over me and push me around as I swim towards my goal of helping people break through barriers of fear or anxiety (with diving, and in life).

(Oh yes, I get the irony of dealing with my own fears while helping others with theirs… Like everyone, I have my own stories, like “I don’t belong. I’m not loveable. I don’t deserve to be happy.” that disempower and limit me when they’re running the show. So I—mostly—don’t let them run the show…)

Yesterday, as I was swimming to the lighthouse (my workout of choice), there was about 20 minutes where I felt like I was swimming in a washing machine. Out past the eastern point of the bay, the wind was kicking up some good sized waves.

And let me tell you, it really takes something to swim in waves that aren’t going your way. If you’ve ever been in the ocean in any kind of “weather”, you know how incredibly powerful it is.

So how DO you swim with waves tossing you about?

By surrendering.

I’m not saying you don’t stroke—you do. You KEEP stroking, one after the other, in the direction that you want to go.

But you don’t FIGHT each wave. As you feel a wave pick you up and move you, or wash over you and push you down, just relax a little. Feel where it wants to take you, allow yourself to go there.

The most important thing to remember is that there is NO way you can overpower the waves. So don’t try—it’ll burn you out.”

But you CAN keep swimming. And if you do, amazingly enough you’ll move towards your destination (really—I’m constantly amazed at how I cover the distance I do).

Yes, it takes skill and strength to swim in the ocean—but even MORE important than these things (because, let’s face it, no amount of human strength and skill is enough to overpower the ocean)—is surrender.

It might seem like a paradox to both swim AND surrender (or in the case of the Breakthrough Process, to accept AND create). It might seem like you can’t do both—that by definition, swimming is NOT surrendering (and accepting is not creating).

Well, I look at it like this—surrender means I let go of my judgment that the waves “SHOULD NOT BE”, and I let go of any attachment to how quickly and how directly I SHOULD get to my destination.

And swimming means that I never stop stroking—that I fully intend to get my destination, one way or the other.

And this equally applies to waves of doubt. It’s OK that they’re there, it’s natural. And yes, they might take me off course, or slow me down—but that’s OK too. As long as I just keep stroking.

Whatever waves you may be swimming in in your life…are you remembering to surrender?

Because that’s how you swim in the waves.

I couldn’t resist using this title. Remember the show Ren and Stimpy? Too funny.

But seriously—and this is a VERY serious topic—did you know that you have to be “in shape” to be able to experience deep and sustained joy?

(And for those of you who like making a distinction between happiness and joy, here’s what J. D. Salinger said: “The fact is always obvious much too late, but the most singular difference between happiness and joy is that happiness is a solid and joy a liquid.” I have no idea what he means by that, but maybe you do.)

Anyway, as I was saying, you have to be in shape if you want to be deeply and/or consistently joyful—because it really takes something.

I mean, sure, when something great happens to you, you feel joy. That’s natural. But here’s the thing—it’s a reaction.

And have you ever noticed that when this really fantastic thing happens in your life your joy is either short-lived and/or not that deeply satisfying? I know I have.”

Because even when it’s a reaction, the depth and length of your experience of joy is a function of what kind of shape you’re in.

If you’re conditioned to experience joy—if you’re “joy muscles” are supple, flexible, toned, and strong from experiencing joy deeply and on a regular basis—then you’ll be able to have a deeper and longer experience of joy.

(Kinda similar to orgasm…but that’s another conversation.)

You know how some people can have something really amazing happen to them—and before you know it, they’re complaining again, or looking for what’s wrong?

But how some people can practically have an orgasm over something the rest of us think is completely trivial?

Well, consider that it’s a matter of matter of how in shape they are.

And so far, we’ve only been talking about joy as a reaction—never mind being able to GENERATE it consciously and consistently. Now that’s a whole OTHER level of being in shape. And for some of us, it takes a breakthrough to make this possible.

But it IS possible.

I know, ’cause I’ve been working out for a while. (Why do you think I’m living on a Caribbean island and coaching, teaching and diving for a living?)

Not only am I able to experience deep and sustained joy in REACTION to my being in a beautiful place and doing what I love, I’m also able to GENERATE joy—even when I’m feeling alone, or worried about money, or feel like I’m struggling with launching a new business…

And just like physical fitness—no matter how in or out of shape you are now—you can always be in better shape. And in this case, that means being able to experience more, deeper and longer joy than you are currently.”

What do you say—you up for giving your “joy muscles” more of a regular workout? (I know what you’re thinking—and yes, that’s ONE way of experiencing joy.)

But really, that’s how you do it—by figuring out ways of bringing and generating more joy into your life on a regular basis.

So, what might that be for you?

NOTE: I just couldn’t resist including this video of Ren and Stimpy. It SO cracks me up…

This was my initial reaction to the suggestion that the world is getting better.

Ah, but again, here we have another example of how what I see depends on my point of view.

Let me explain. Or better yet, let Peter Diamandis explain. He just co-authored a book called Abundance—”a tale of good news”.

It examines the hard facts, the science and engineering, the social trends and economic forces that are rapidly transforming our world.”

Peter is NOT saying we’re not facing major problems, and that there won’t be major bumps along the way such as “economic meltdowns, natural disasters, terrorist attacks”.

But what he IS saying is that despite unspeakable tragedy (in the form of war, plagues and natural disasters) in the twentieth century, there was incredible advancement.

Infant mortality decreased by 90%, maternal mortality decreased by 99%, human lifespan increased by over 100%, and even the poorest Americans have access to a telephone, television, and a flush toilet—three luxuries that even the wealthiest couldn’t imagine at the turn of the century”.

The book goes on to build a very compelling case to show that quality of life has improved more in the last century than in all of human history.

And that—”rude, heartbreaking interruptions” notwithstanding—”global living standards will continue to improve regardless of the horrors that dominate the headlines”.

This is exciting!

I’m excited because this isn’t about denial. It’s not even about transcending what’s going on.

It’s about recognizing that there are already HUGE forces at play that are empowering us—right now!—to solve our problems. Forces that are already transforming our world into one of abundance for all.

This isn’t about positive thinking. This is about the rubber hitting the road!

This is about maverick inventors like Dean Kamen and Craig Venter, brilliant technology entrepreneurs such as Larry Page and Elon Musk, and international business giants like Ratan Tata and Anousheh Ansari driving radical breakthroughs in energy, life sciences, education and global development.”

Peter goes on to describe the number of exponentially growing forces at play that have brought humanity into a period of radical transformation.

These forces are:

• science and technology: “instantaneous and low-cost information and communication via wireless and internet; computational systems, networks and sensors, artificial intelligence, robotics, biotechnology, bioinformatics, 3-D printing, nanotechnology, human-machine interfaces, biomedical engineering”
• the “do-it-yourself” revolution: “the purview of backyard tinkerers has extended far beyond custom cars and homebrew computers, and now reaches into once-esoteric field like genetics and robotics; these days, small groups of motivated DIY-ers can accomplish what was once the sole province of large corporations and governments” (you’ll have to read the book to find out about amazing examples of this—it’ll blow your mind!)
• wealthy techno-philanthropists: the high-tech revolution has created a growing number of people who are “using their fortunes to solve global, abundance-related challenges”.
• the rising billion: the “poorest of the poor” are finally able to “plug in” to the global economy thanks to the combination of the Internet, microfinance, and wireless communication technology; this is “transforming the poorest of the poor into an emerging market force”

Is this crazy, or what?! I know it sounds like it—but it’s true!

Imagine a world of nine billion people with clean water, nutritious food, affordable housing, personalized education, top-tier medical care, and nonpolluting, ubiquitous energy. Abundance for all is actually within our grasp.”

Clearly it’s hard to imagine this now, but I’ll tell you—it’s a lot easier to imagine after listening to Peter. Here’s Peter on TED. And I highly recommend you get the book—and pass it on.

Creating this world is our greatest challenge—and Abundance is “the story of how we can rise to meet it”.

C’mon—we can do this thing!

Peace,

Jason

I know, I know, a diver talking about learning how to fish—what’s up with that? ;p

But I’m talking metaphorically here. Specifically, the “teach a person to fish” metaphor.

As you may know, Lao Tzu said, “Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, feed him for a lifetime.”

I’m thinking the same goes for “food for thought”, wouldn’t you say? If we know how to find and capture the thoughts that nourish and strengthen us, we’ll be able to live happy and fulfilling lives—consistently, and on our own terms.

If, however, we have to depend on others for our mental, emotional and spiritual nourishment—on their terms—well…nuff said…

And it IS easy to get caught up in this trap of “feed me, please!” Especially since there’s an ever-increasing number of people putting an incredible amount of positive and inspirational stuff out there for us to digest.

But here’s the thing—until we develop our OWN ability to generate the thoughts that bring us freedom and joy, we’re essentially going to be living as victims.”

We’ll be at the mercy of others, subsisting on hand-outs, grateful for the wisdom and generosity of others as they hand us our morsel of food.

Which is why I do the work that I do—teaching people HOW to purposefully think the thoughts that bring sustenance and well-being, no matter what’s going on around them.

For example, while on the surface it might seem that the Breakthrough Adventures program is about having an incredible experience doing something you’ve always wanted to do (which it is), it’s REALLY about learning how to fish.

It’s about learning how to shift your point of view—your way of thinking—to one that feeds you, empowers you, nourishes you, strengthens you.

Same with the Coaching Game. While I use it in the coaching process, I also make it available for people to buy and use in their own lives—so they can better do their own fishing.

I mean, think about it—when it comes to fishing, the fish are all there, right? Hanging out, available for the catching…”

(I know, it’s getting less so—but you get my point.)

You need to know where to find them. And you need to have the knowledge, tools and skill to catch them and take them back to shore (where you can then eat some, and sell the rest for shelter, clothing, other food items, etc.).

Same goes for life-giving thoughts. They’re ALWAYS there, available to us…we just need to be able to find and capture them. So we can satisfy our mental, emotional and spiritual appetites.

What about you—have you learned how to fish? Are you becoming masterful at fishing?

(Be sure to let me know if you’d like some support with this—cause if I’m not able to assist you, I probably know someone who can.)

Peace,

Jason

I’ve started an exercise routine of swimming to the lighthouse and back. (Actually, it’s not really a lighthouse—it’s more of a light-tower.) It’s probably close to a kilometre away, and takes me about 45 minutes, depending on the wind, waves, and tide.

But that’s not the point.

The point is that my swim—at least my experience of the swim—has actually become quite relaxed. (Mentally, not physically—’cause I AM still working pretty hard.)

Which means I don’t suffer as much as I used to. True, it’s partly due to physical conditioning—but it’s mostly due to my way of thinking.

Let me explain.

You see, I’ve stopped resisting being face-down in the water.”

“What?!”, you say. “Of course you don’t resist being face-down in the water—you’re a swimmer!”

Ah, but I’m talking about subtle resistance.

For example, am I lying COMPLETELY horizontally in the water (face-down)? Are my neck and shoulders completely relaxed? What about when I go to breathe—do I try to lift my head out of the water, or do I simply rotate it?

To the degree that I’m not doing these things, I’m resisting lying face down in the water.

Now it’s totally understandable, of course. I mean—every few strokes I’m faced with not being able to breathe…which, let’s face it, is a bit of a pickle. So of course my natural tendency is to resist—to some degree—TOTALLY submerging my head in the water, TOTALLY letting go and letting gravity pull me down.

But that’s exactly what I NEED to do to be an efficient swimmer. And—as it turns out—it’s also exactly how to eliminate the “suffering”.

How did I have this breakthrough? I worked my way backwards through the “think. be. do. have.” paradigm to discover what was going on:

Once I got all this, I was like, “Dude—it’s OK, I totally get it. It’s totally natural to be afraid. And it’s OK that you’re afraid.”

And after I sat with that for a bit, I was able to re-create the way I looked at swimming.

What a perfect metaphor for life, no?!

So I asked myself, “What am I resisting in my life?”

Well for one thing, I’m constantly resisting failing, looking bad, getting it wrong, etc… And it’s frickin’ exhausting! Not to mention inefficient. It leaves me struggling and not enjoying the journey.

Now I remind myself to stop resisting and totally relax into the idea there’s no such thing as failing—and it completely lights me up! And I move through my day much more efficiently and effortlessly!

What about you? Is there an area where you have limited results? Where perhaps you’re resisting something and limiting your experience of personal power, freedom and joy?

Try relaxing into whatever it is that you’re resisting, and see if it makes a difference. I bet it will.